I guess this is a very delicate topic to write about, but I am sure all people in this world has gone through the phase of the entangling relationships and feelings, where you are uncertain what’s happening to you and your surroundings. People tend to misunderstand most of the time the feelings of dependence as love, or is it true?
I read the following as quoted in a blog from the book Elizabeth George’s “Missing Joseph” where the woman wonders what love is…

I don’t know what it means to love anyone, she realized. I thought it was goodness, a wanting to share. I thought it meant like you hold out your hand and someone takes it, holds it hard, and pulls you safe from the river. You talk. You tell him bits of yourself. You say here’s where I hurt and you give it to him and he holds it and gives you where he hurts in return and you hold it and that’s how you learn to love. You lean where he’s strong. He leans where you’re strong. And there’s a joining somewhere .. ..

I have heard lots of break ups and past relations of few people. In most cases, they think that its their fault or blame the other. Is it wrong to get dependent and keep expectations? I don’t think so. Maybe you have to learn to accept the reality also. As said in DDLJ film, you may dream and you have the right to dream, but don’t ever keep the expectations that the dream and our expectations should be true and should happen at that point of time. I guess thats the reason for most of the friction occurring in any relation.

Even after these small frictions and official breakups, the feelings never change, only the intensity comes down. And feelings are distinguished by their intensity. The base of all feelings are care and concern for the other, and I guess this never changes in any relationship, even though you start to hate the other or even till the end of their life. Relations never die, maybe the intensity reduces to almost to an unknown level.

As posted by Megha, society do play a very important role in confusing the relations. Age maybe the factor when you are young, but there are other reasons in later part of life, when the relations are disturbed and named something else. And the strange thing is the society includes all the learned people and still they do keep the conventional points and rules at heart.

Boys say girls can never be trusted. They change their decisions any time. Gals keep saying boys are cheaters, and they leave them whenever they are enough of the gals. Both boys and gals are human beings and I guess its in their genes to take risk and immature decisions at certain specified ages. Maybe when you realize these, people say you’ve grown up. We tend to accept the reality and try to live in the practical world, making decisions based on feasibility. Maybe we may not be happy as our wishes has not fulfilled. But we move on to find happiness in what we achieve and receive. Be it professional and personal life. We may do cry like a child at times, but regain ourselves, without anyone to understand us or make us understand. We get to know whats the relations are and their importance.

But still, people do move on, accepting the strange ways of relations and also the society, accepting reality and becomes more “practical”, as they say.
Again as Someone said,

“Everything will be OK in the end, if its not, its not the end…”

Maybe this is what you call life. To live with a ray of hope that everything will be ok in the end…

Happy birthday to my w810i! It was on this day, last year, which falls on a weekday, at around night 7-8pm with my friend, that I bought this mobile phone, from Spencer’s plaza Chennai for a whooping amount of 22k! Ehem!
It was a long run search for me that time, I was confused whether to go Symbian or not, and had the options of w800i, n70, and then this w810i. To know more about how frantic and desperate I was, you can go through the following threads at various forums (chronological order):

http://www.thinkdigit.com/forum/showthread.php?t=26512

http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=4655
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=28124
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=28126
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=27863
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=34225
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=44883
http://forums.techarena.in/showthread.php?t=48785

http://forum.techspot.in/showthread.php?t=1879
http://forum.techspot.in/showthread.php?t=2037
http://forum.techspot.in/showthread.php?t=2199

http://www.techenclave.com/forums/sony-w810i-k800i-etc-vs-n72-77279.html

Not to forget the innumerous chat sessions, and discussions of pros n cons and that n this of various phones and technologies and its usage! bah!

I would really like to thank each one of them who stood by me in the mind battle and did not let me down inspite of my stubborn nature.Thanks to my parents and my mom, who gave the support to spend that much money (:P), Thanks to my cousin who I troubled lot for the same..and last, but not least, thanks to the friend who was with me, arguing and supporting, bearing my tantrums that day while buying the mobile!

It might seem to be a strange coincidence, but today, I am wearing the same dress, as the same day last year, with those black metal kinda earrings, with only few differences that, I have gone so thin(!!) and also that I don’t have the friend with me anymore. But on a lighter note, I still managed to attain a ’sent message count’ of 9150 (at the time of blog posting) for the whole year!!!

EDIT: Surpassed 10k sent messages on this saturday, April 21st!

Last night, I accidently heard the song from the film “Sillinu oru kaadhal”(or is it “Jillinu oru kaadhal!.. bah! I dono!! who cares!). It reminded me of the film story again.

The story goes like this. Gautam(Surya) is married to Kundavi(Jyothika) and has a kid also. A happy family of age 8 years with the usual tensions at times. Then one day, while, Gautam is out of station, Kundavi finds his old diary, and starts reading it. In the diary, he says about his college days, his college love, Aishu(Bhumika Chawla), who is a Telugu girl and daughter of some minister (high position type!) and how they were in love, the happy days, and then finally the decision to run-away and get married inspite of her parents reluctance, and in the end, how they gets splitted up in the register court, cos of her father’s tactics..(Its shown in the film, that by the time, the villain ppl separates the love-couple, the knot has been tied between Gautam and Aishu.) The diary ends with a note, that his sole wish is to meet Aishu just once more.. Kundavi then decides to make the two people unite once more, to fulfill his wishes! And as filmy as it can be, Aishu is shown returning from Australia and is still angry with her father and family. Kundavi meets her up (And provides us a hint that Aishu is still living as Gautam’s wife!). After a stretched drama, Kundavi manages to make Gautam and Aishu meet at their house. The film ends with Kundavi returning back home, only to find a farewell note from Aishu to her, saying that she is thankful to her for this meeting before her departure back to Australia, and also assured her that, she realized from the talk she had with Gautam, that he loves only Kundavi now, and has completely moved on from the past… Thereafter Gautam and Kundavi lives happily everafter!

The film has a happy ending and the onscreen chemistry of Surya and Jyothika was a big hit as always. But the song, “Munpe vaa” portraying Aishu and Gautam of their happy college days is a bitter one, as in the end, its not portrayed what happens to Aishu and how she lives on. Why is that relationship not given that much importance from Gautam’s side? He was rebellious in his college days to break her away from her family and to get married. Why hasn’t he felt or given any thoughts to how she might have been living? Why did he hide the fact from Kundavi? Maybe cos he doesn’t think of it anymore. But if she too had married someone else and had moved on from the past, then we could have concluded its really a happy ending. Here, its absurd!! They say, the time is different, time heals all wounds, all pains… Maybe its true, but what about some scars which never heal? Maybe pains get cured, but how to erase those memories?

I guess life itself is absurd, leave alone the films and stories!!
Peace!